Cinester Theater Presents: Planet of the Apes
Cinester Theater is taking on Tim Burton once again in their latest riff, "Cinester Theater Presents: Planet of the Apes"!
Space zookeeper and monkey-torture enthusiast "Marky" Mark Wahlberg has a problem. He knows he's got the right stuff to be a big time astronaut, but the eggheads upstairs keep telling him he's less qualified to operate their multimillion dollar equipment than a chimp that's been trained to flip levers in a sequence. So when a mysterious space anomaly appears just outside their space station, Mark steals a ship and flies himself right into it, while also kind of vindicating the total lack of faith his superiors had placed in him up to that point.
He crashlands on a mysterious planet populated exclusively by humans, apes, horses, and Paul Giamatti. Hunted by the personal-space-ignoring General Thade, Mark must navigate this strange new world as he attempts to find a way home, after taking a slight detour through one of the most eye-rolling twists in cinematic history.
Will Mark Wahlberg ever see Boston again? Why does that girl monkey keep looking at him like that? And what are any of these characters' names again?
Some of these questions will be answered as Cinester Theater Presents: Planet of the Apes!
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This is a movie riff, which means it's an audio-only file designed to be synced up and played simultaneously with a copy of the movie. Think "Mystery Science Theater 3000", but with 3 guys and a goblin instead of robots.
DOESN'T THAT VIOLATE COPYRIGHT?
Nope. This file is audio-only. You have to have a copy of Tim Burton's "Planet of the Apes", either on DVD, BluRay, or streaming services, in order to enjoy this riff. Just try not to let anyone see you buying "Planet of the Apes".
HOW DOES IT WORK?
Syncing instructions are included at the beginning of the riff. Throughout the film, there will be "sync lines", which will indicate if the movie and this audio file are properly synced. It's mostly "set it and forget it", but if slight adjustments are needed, the sync lines are there to help you make them.
IS IT FUNNY?
Oh man. Yeah. Yeah, it is.